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Exposed!

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As most of you know Beyonce’ released an album that is titled “Sasha Fierce”.  In this debut she unveils her alter ego; the other side of Beyonce.  She allows us to catch a glimpse of who the real performer is and who the real personality is.  Sasha Fierce is the woman we all see singing, groaning, moaning, shakin’, poppin, droppin, and performing her but off-The Diva.   Beyonce is the shy meek professional behind the fame and fortune-The Lady.  She allows us to see that there is two people residing inside of her.  One is a supreme entertainer and the other is a private ordinary Lady.  The thought of this brought me to last saturday  when my husband and I had a disagreement that was completely out of pocket and a backlash to my insecurities.  After the confrontation, I went to bed feeling pretty good about myself and decided that Team D had won and Team B had lost.  I felt a sigh of relief because I felt in control; I had clearly obliterated my partner with words and probably emotionally and spiritually annihilated him, I felt great and I was able to go straight to sleep after my performance.  Well the next morning, God woke me up with an awful feeling in my stomach, and it was the nauseau of embarrassment and guilt.  I went from feeling high on a horse to low in a pit; I felt pretty immature.   My husband and I have an inside joke that we share, because I like to tease him and say he has two personalities Bobby Lee the loving husband and doting father; and B. Jax the athlete who can be egotistical and crass at times.  This day I was confronted with a horrible truth;  there is Dona and there is D.Jax.  Lord willin’ some of you have only experienced Dona, and God bless those who have experienced D.Jax.

D. Jax thinks she knows everything, she usually can be caught cutting someone off in a conversation or completely dominating a conversation.  Dona likes to listen and usually only offers advice when led.  D.Jax is haughty and selfish, she wants her way no matter what it takes.  Dona is rather simple and puts her family’s needs before her own.  D.Jax is rude, she speaks before she thinks and usually could care less who she might offend.  In fact, D. Jax is rather self righteous; no one knows more than D.Jax.  D.Jax doesn’t forget she is a  Christian but, she will get real close to crossing the line i.e. road rage, tongue lashings, etc.  Dona wants to grow and finds happiness in learning from life’s lessons.  D.Jax hates pain and would rather put someone in check rather than check herself.   Long to the short Dona is the loving wife and doting mother enjoys serving others and giving love-D.Jax is the selfish hater who hates to be patient, and usually feels good if she can issue a verbal beat down of some sort.  

My sister Sonya calls her other personality “The Hulk”.  I think she’s being subtle, however, she is woman enough to admit that she does snap from time to time and it doesn’t look lady like.  That’s what self check and growing is right; being mature enough to say “I Blow it” from time to time and this is what it looks like.  You may have an alter ego or another personality, or you may just make mistakes without labels.  Whatever the case, be able to “Man or Woman up” and say there is another person on the inside and if I don’t check him or her somebody could get slapped into 2010.  D.Jax isn’t around often because I try and keep her at bay with bible study, prayer, surrendering my life to Christ, and a few naps.  Without Christ in our lives checking us